Rainbows and Black Unicorns

Tag: Scanxiety

  • A month later…

    Christmas was ok. Infection was gone and the mountains were awesome. We had a nice dinner with family and it was worth going. By the time we got home Amy had another infection. That got treated and then a new one developed. Omg it’s never ending. Friday she spent all afternoon in urgent care. They…

  • results

    CT came back clear! Yay! Another new ugly infection, though. Sigh… Amy needed an unusual drug not commonly prescribed so the pharmacist had to call around to ask who stocked it. He is the best. Today, a new urologist called with a dec 5 appointment. No idea what he can do for her but he…

  • scan Day

    Here are we again. Time for another scan. It’s always unsettling waiting for results and…Amy has another infection. She called the urologist and he won’t prescribe anything until nurse takes a sample on Wednesday. But when her urine smells like ammonia she knows it’s that awful bacterial infection she had last week. Sigh… On a…

  • Low

    I’ve watched 2 YouTubers that do caregiving for cancer spouses. I’ve noticed they never talk about anger, frustration or irritability. They might talk about fear but not the debilitating fear that comes from waiting for the next phone call, next scan, next symptom. They might mention sadness but not the overwhelming grief that comes from…

  • the wheels have come off

    Three surgeons agreed surgery is very risky. Oncologist, urologist and plastic surgeon all agreed she needs surgery but is it too risky? Right now Amy has a ostomy bag for urine and one for poop. She also has a tube coming out of her back to drain urine into a bag worn around her ankle.…

  • and here we go again

    I’ve been absent for several days because I’ve been busy dealing with one crisis after another. September 8, Amy’s temperature spiked at 38.2. Off we went to the hospital at 6pm. We waited for 16 hours to be told the the Ctscan was off, she has an infection and they were going to admit her.…

  • Scanxiety is real

    If you’re a cancer patient, survivor or caregiver you’ll be very aware of scanxiety. Every new procedure, scan or doctor visit can bring it on. It’s the unknown that rocks us off our tenuous balance beam. What will they say? What happens next? How will we cope? Scanxiety is so strong today. Surgery is tomorrow…