cancer caregivers

“When there’s a cancer diagnosis, it’s actually a diagnosis for the family because the cascading effects affect so many people,” says Dr. Griffin. For example, when a spouse or a parent receives a cancer diagnosis, the other members of the household must step into new roles while the person with cancer focuses on treatment and healing.

Practical needs and self-care come first

Once these practical needs are addressed, establish a pattern of caring for yourself so you have the strength and endurance to care for your loved one with cancer. Make sure you have the emotional support you’ll need, such as a circle of friends or a support group you can touch base with when things are particularly challenging. Establish an exercise routine that helps relieve stress. And lean on friends, family or community resources to secure time for activities that bring joy.

“You need something that brings you solace,” says Dr. Griffin. “Some way to help you cope and manage all the stress that’s going to come with that role.”

Everyone will have big emotions

“Patients often have to manage and think about issues of grief, of grieving what their life was like, grieving what they have lost because of the diagnosis, and not really knowing what’s going to happen next,” says Dr. Griffin.

Caregivers – especially if the person they’re caring for is a spouse or a partner – may also be feeling these things. The caregiver and the person with cancer are likely feeling fear as well – fear of death, fear of losing a loved one, fear of the financial challenges that come from losing income and paying medical bills.

“There are a lot of things that caregivers keep inside, even things they typically may have shared with the person with cancer,” says Dr. Griffin. “The caregiver is often not going to share those things, because it’s just not considered to be what a good caregiver does.”