the wheels have come off

Three surgeons agreed surgery is very risky.
Oncologist, urologist and plastic surgeon all agreed she needs surgery but is it too risky?

Right now Amy has a ostomy bag for urine and one for poop. She also has a tube coming out of her back to drain urine into a bag worn around her ankle. The there’s the urine leakage that is coming out due to the fistula.
if they do surgery and nick her bowel then poop will leak into her belly. Anndd?? The consequences are endless.
They’ve asked her to get another opinion which they will arrange. They are scared and wondering if she can live like this for the rest of her life rather than risk surgery.
That’s a heavy decision. Not one I can help her with nor would I want to. I’m not even sure I could make that decision for myself.

Amy doesn’t deserve this. They told her she might loose more colon, it would be a major surgery and her tummy would be sliced open again which means an exhaustive recovery.

it’s too bad I have no friends left. I could really use someone to talk to so I can process this news. I want someone who won’t judge me but can help me sort out out the losses and try to be accepting of this new reality.
We had this dream that when she was better we would go back to Scotland and Ireland. Amy’s health is too fragile to travel beyond our Canadian borders. Good thing it’s so large and beautiful! Still, it’s sad and not what we wanted or hoped for. It’s going to take me a long time to process all the losses because we kept hoping the next thing would be last thing then we could move forward with what we have. Now, we’re back to waiting for the next surgeon to call, the next ctscan in 2 weeks and then a meeting with medical oncologist to discuss scan.

No rest for the wicked?