How to support

Most people think sending flowers is the only way to show support. They follow that up with “ call if you need anything”. I’m here to offer some other ideas.

Very few of us will ask for help. It’s just uncomfortable and some of us have followed the therapeutic idea of asking for what you need with dire consequences. Asking has blown up too many times for me to do it again.
During Covid (and cancer) I asked a few people to do grocery runs. One time a woman decided that what I was asking for wasn’t necessary. It was to me! Another time, someone got everything I asked for but was so angry at having to go out of her way she was vibrating. I never asked again.

In my opinion I think it’s best to say “ I can come over for 2 hours either Tuesday or Thursday. I can do grocery shopping, cut your grass or walk your dog. Which do you prefer?”

Let the caregiver decide what is most needed at that time. It might be to come and visit with the patient while the caregiver sits in a park.

Please don’t wait to be asked. Many, many things are needed. Your skills and talents could make the difference between coping and falling apart.

PS if you read this or any of my posts could you please comment about how the site looks and if it’s easy to read?