Aloneness vs loneliness

I’m alone and I’m lonely.

In my aloneness I’m getting some stuff done that I’ve been too busy or tired to do. That is wonderful.

In my loneliness I find myself worrying about the past and the future.
Will we ever get to travel? Will the cancer recur for the umpteenth time?
We have an anniversary in September that I would like to plan but it has to be cancellable ( is that even a word?!?!). No more losing money due to infections.